How to Meet New Friends and Build Community in Graduate School

I will always remember my first day at Tufts. I had moved to the area a week prior, and I was nowhere near settled or adjusted. My first day on campus I immediately got lost searching for the Collaborative Learning and Innovation Complex, where I needed to pick up my ID. I then proceeded to get even more lost as I searched for the Science and Technology Center, where I had my department orientation.

I felt incredibly silly when I realized that these two buildings were mere feet from each other all along.  

I thought going through my orientation would make me feel more at peace. But even after finding the buildings, listening to the talks, and starting my classes, I still didn’t feel relieved. I was anxious about the difficulty of my classes, I was doubtful about how I would fit into my department, and I was so scared about how to approach making friends. I was basically a nervous wreck! 

I wish I could tell myself a year ago that it would all be okay. In the following months, I met the best people who I know now will be lifelong friends (as cheesy as that sounds), and I can say with confidence I have an incredible community at Tufts.  

The process wasn’t always easy or straightforward, and no friends magically fell into my lap. Building a community in graduate schools requires some effort. Luckily, Tufts has great systems in place to facilitate connection and grow friendships within programs and even across departments. 

As simple as it sounds, one of the easiest ways I made friends was through my classes. Tufts is a smaller graduate school, which means you often have smaller class sizes. I love this because it also means you share classes with many of the same people every day. Once I built up the courage to chat with some of my classmates, I realized the emotions I was experiencing that left me feeling isolated – doubt, fear, and anxiety – actually were great things to connect about with others who felt the same exact way.  

But having shared classes wasn't the only way I connected with people. Tufts’ Graduate Student Council (GSC) is an amazing resource to start building community. I found this organization helpful for introducing me to friends outside of my department. Whether it’s the weekly meetings, monthly dinners, or larger standalone events – my favorite being the Spring Boat Prom on the Charles River –the GSC is a great way to bring together all graduate students.  

Tufts also has eight affinity centers that help connect students with shared identities and backgrounds. These organizations host talks and events to bring together students who otherwise may not have shared classes or clubs. Many of these affinity groups have their own spaces that are open for visitors, fostering welcoming home bases during stressful, overwhelming, or isolating times.  

Some of my closest friends were made through random interactions. I met a best friend of mine one evening walking towards the T, mainly because we were the only two headed in the direction of Ball Square. Another I met waiting for the green line to arrive on a particularly quiet evening. Clearly, the T has been a great facilitator of friendship for me!  

I am living proof that it is possible to meet friends when you start a graduate program. I went from knowing no one at Tufts to having a really solid community of friends that I cannot imagine my life without. I am forever grateful to Tufts for being the place where I connected with some of the most amazing people in my life! 

PS: Even if you are geographically challenged like me, I promise you will eventually figure out your way around campus (which really helps ease the nerves as well).